6.a, the Human Ostrich Syndrome
And so, with great trepidation, I launched into the night as an eager fledgling vampire. With Billy, my benevolent mentor, in close attendance, scooting the rooftops was easier than skimming plectrum-shaped stones off a placid lake. No eaves too high, no alleyway too wide. The spring in my calves and hamstrings delivered a thrust no mortal would ever realise.
The only missing elements were adrenalin and a racing heart to pump it. My heart? Long dead. But, who needed adrenalin when there was more power at my heel than any anabolic steroid could equivocally deliver?!
The only missing elements were adrenalin and a racing heart to pump it. My heart? Long dead. But, who needed adrenalin when there was more power at my heel than any anabolic steroid could equivocally deliver?!
The lack of a pulse discouraged me not at all. What good was a heart now, even in a metaphoric sense? A trail of almost-lovers had taken turns stomping upon my heart over the years in senior school. Long before Billy had metamorphosed from a creature that haunted my day- and nightmares into this archaic alchemist who had deigned to offer me a new life, my heart was my Achilles heel.
The result? I was a reincarnated being who transcended those cutting corporeal emotions. The creature who now inhabited my body, a vessel that those before had sought to scorn, dared them to taunt me now. Revenge was never the motive for accepting Billy's gift so willingly. But upon realising the utter power in my limbs, neither was revenge now ruled out of the universe of possibilities beyond the jet night sky that threw itself open at my feet.
The town over whose rooftops we sped looked familiar. With its materialistic mask stripped away, it had taken on a different aspect. But if I wanted, if I put my mind to it, I could ferret those who'd taken advantage of my previous good nature. What a fright I could give them now if I hung by my toes upside down against their bedroom windows.
The more heinous possibilities I considered, the greater the temptation to embark upon a frightful mission distracted me. As if some manner of fate adhered even to this life, I lost my footing as my mind meandered too far down one street or another. Billy, of course, sensed my mistake and fell back in tandem.
Even so: I. Felt. Invincible.
Before I could get intoxicated with this new-found litheness any further, Billy raced on ahead of me, to divert me from the path that my mind had begun wandering along. Lest I forget, tonight was more than a game or a way to pat myself on the back; there were lessons to be learned. And although the balance of power between Billy and I had tilted hugely in my favour, brawn wasn't everything. I would do well to respect him and the lessons I could learn from him in the short time we had left together.
Many, many miles away from us, I smelled ozone exploding off crashing waves. Again, I was rapt in the newness of it all. Billy had to stop me in my tracks before I wondered off a ledge and would have, no doubt, caused a scene in the street below, had any God-fearing mortal been out at this hour.
He led, I followed, my mindset at last tuned in to the task at hand. Sensing my new focus, he sped up. I matched him, he accelerated again.
Within minutes, I felt the sea-smoothed pebbles on the balls of my feet; the soft sand compressed between my toes as waves lapped and shushed against the silver shore. We had been miles from the sea when its bursting ozone had first reached my senses. How had we arrived in such short a time? I would have simply stood there, considering the mystery, whilst gazing in awe at the jet-black sea, guardian of so many secrets, flolloping at my fancy-free feet, the gentle hush of its breakers-on-pebbles soothing my saturated mind.
There would be plenty of time for indulging my mind and even fantasies later. Say, maybe a thousand years from now. My previous self would never have been able to imagine living for 1,000 years. But now, I could see the stars, and beyond. A millennium was but a fleeting second to the greater powers that drove the universe. To reach even the shortest milestone, I had to learn how to be Brotherhood of the Night. Without establishing my limitations, any thoughts and dreams of the stars were confined to the fanciful, I feared.
Regrettably, we left the beach and, to my surprise, took the road back into the town. The path along the clifftop was a long one, affording a view of the harbour and the moon setting above the bare masts, which bobbed in the harbour like an undulating forest in a midwinter gale.
We had got so far along the path when Billy stopped me by placing his hands on my shoulders. There was the devil of a smile on his face, and for a moment I feared he was ready to dash me off the cliff into the sea below. Wasn't running water supposed to be abhorrent, even fatal, to vampires? If that had been his intent, he would have had the upper hand on me, so far had I let my guard drop. That was lesson one right there, intended or not.
But, no. Billy got me to stand in place with hand motions and I watched him walk on up the path we were heading along. Every now and then, he'd turn to make sure I'd not moved. Was this the time? Was I to meet the master here? All of a sudden, my confidence was on the wane. And still, Billy walked on, turning every now and then, until he'd gone half a mile along the path.
He stopped, turned and was looking directly at me. He held up his hand, which I could see as clearly as if it was here on the end of my own arm thanks to my enhanced vision. I raised a hand back, unsure of what this all signified.
Next, he began to extend his arm, which held his Gibben axe, away to his right and towards the sea. Slowly, slowly his reach extended over the cliff's edge until...he was gone! Just, disappeared from my eyeline altogether.
Had he fallen over the cliff's edge? No, I would have seen it. Was this a test of loyalty? Was I supposed to wait for him to resurface or go save him? I couldn't take the chance, so went to move after him. I'd just broken into stride when I felt the ground behind my feet shudder with metal scraping through soil and against stone, then a whistle caught up with the 'clump' the Gibben had made at my heels.
I turned in a flash and, a full half a mile away from me in the opposite direction, there stood Billy. Just how had he managed that, travelling a full mile passing me halfway in a split second without me seeing him? And still find time to fling an axe with such precision that its impact had spewed soil and grit up between my ankles?
Yes, I may be stronger than Billy now. But he had a bag of tricks up his sleeve against which I was no match. I took my eye off him for a second to bend down to heft out the axe from the ground, but his hand was on it before mine. I literally staggered backwards in surprise.
That half-smile had spread to his lips once again and, pointing the tip of the axe right into the corner of his eye, he explained it succinctly: Slippage! Our kind inhabited that world between worlds, right on the edge of peripheral vision. Whilst someone could perceivably see a whole panorama from the corner of their eye, the distance the eye physically travelled to take it all in was a matter of mere millimetres. Those millimetres were our vehicle!
For the next two hours—out there on a clifftop path in the obsidian night—Billy taught me how to use Slippage. Being so close to the crashing waves beneath ensured that I concentrated fully on the task at hand.
By the time the moon had come to rest upon the hulls of the moored boats and the horizon opposite was turning fog-grey, I'd just about grasped the concept. I don't know whether Billy feigned the couple of times he looked genuinely surprised to find me a way off from where he'd last seen me. But I'd felt the journey: it was surreal. Travelling on the tide of Slippage felt as if you didn't really exist at all. In truth, while you were travelling, I got the sense that I was no longer in this realm, the hard fact of an Earth beneath your feet a seeming improbability.
Even more unnerving was the sense of other creatures inhabiting that temporary space you inhabited along the way. Whatever creatures lived there, I wasn't ready to meet them. Yet. Stay in that realm for any longer than you needed to make the journey and I had the feeling that all the supernatural powers I possessed on this Earth would count for very little there. Not a place in which a fledgling vampire wished to dwell if he was to realise the potential of eternal life.
For tonight, training was over. If this was the sum of my education, I felt I'd learned a good deal, but nothing like enough. But now the dawn beckoned and the night for us was over. Time for sleep. But I had no idea how or where my bed (or coffin?) lay. I let Billy lead and was almost asleep when I fell to sleep on a vacated shelf in the Manor's mausoleum.
"No coffin?", I asked Billy. He pointed to his wrist, then made a circle twice where a watch would have sat upon someone who needed to tell the time.
"Tomorrow night?" I asked, to confirm my interpretation. I saw him nod before the lid to his coffin slid closed and I myself drifted into a dreamless sleep.
The result? I was a reincarnated being who transcended those cutting corporeal emotions. The creature who now inhabited my body, a vessel that those before had sought to scorn, dared them to taunt me now. Revenge was never the motive for accepting Billy's gift so willingly. But upon realising the utter power in my limbs, neither was revenge now ruled out of the universe of possibilities beyond the jet night sky that threw itself open at my feet.
The town over whose rooftops we sped looked familiar. With its materialistic mask stripped away, it had taken on a different aspect. But if I wanted, if I put my mind to it, I could ferret those who'd taken advantage of my previous good nature. What a fright I could give them now if I hung by my toes upside down against their bedroom windows.
The more heinous possibilities I considered, the greater the temptation to embark upon a frightful mission distracted me. As if some manner of fate adhered even to this life, I lost my footing as my mind meandered too far down one street or another. Billy, of course, sensed my mistake and fell back in tandem.
Even so: I. Felt. Invincible.
Before I could get intoxicated with this new-found litheness any further, Billy raced on ahead of me, to divert me from the path that my mind had begun wandering along. Lest I forget, tonight was more than a game or a way to pat myself on the back; there were lessons to be learned. And although the balance of power between Billy and I had tilted hugely in my favour, brawn wasn't everything. I would do well to respect him and the lessons I could learn from him in the short time we had left together.
Many, many miles away from us, I smelled ozone exploding off crashing waves. Again, I was rapt in the newness of it all. Billy had to stop me in my tracks before I wondered off a ledge and would have, no doubt, caused a scene in the street below, had any God-fearing mortal been out at this hour.
He led, I followed, my mindset at last tuned in to the task at hand. Sensing my new focus, he sped up. I matched him, he accelerated again.
Within minutes, I felt the sea-smoothed pebbles on the balls of my feet; the soft sand compressed between my toes as waves lapped and shushed against the silver shore. We had been miles from the sea when its bursting ozone had first reached my senses. How had we arrived in such short a time? I would have simply stood there, considering the mystery, whilst gazing in awe at the jet-black sea, guardian of so many secrets, flolloping at my fancy-free feet, the gentle hush of its breakers-on-pebbles soothing my saturated mind.
There would be plenty of time for indulging my mind and even fantasies later. Say, maybe a thousand years from now. My previous self would never have been able to imagine living for 1,000 years. But now, I could see the stars, and beyond. A millennium was but a fleeting second to the greater powers that drove the universe. To reach even the shortest milestone, I had to learn how to be Brotherhood of the Night. Without establishing my limitations, any thoughts and dreams of the stars were confined to the fanciful, I feared.
Regrettably, we left the beach and, to my surprise, took the road back into the town. The path along the clifftop was a long one, affording a view of the harbour and the moon setting above the bare masts, which bobbed in the harbour like an undulating forest in a midwinter gale.
We had got so far along the path when Billy stopped me by placing his hands on my shoulders. There was the devil of a smile on his face, and for a moment I feared he was ready to dash me off the cliff into the sea below. Wasn't running water supposed to be abhorrent, even fatal, to vampires? If that had been his intent, he would have had the upper hand on me, so far had I let my guard drop. That was lesson one right there, intended or not.
But, no. Billy got me to stand in place with hand motions and I watched him walk on up the path we were heading along. Every now and then, he'd turn to make sure I'd not moved. Was this the time? Was I to meet the master here? All of a sudden, my confidence was on the wane. And still, Billy walked on, turning every now and then, until he'd gone half a mile along the path.
He stopped, turned and was looking directly at me. He held up his hand, which I could see as clearly as if it was here on the end of my own arm thanks to my enhanced vision. I raised a hand back, unsure of what this all signified.
Next, he began to extend his arm, which held his Gibben axe, away to his right and towards the sea. Slowly, slowly his reach extended over the cliff's edge until...he was gone! Just, disappeared from my eyeline altogether.
Had he fallen over the cliff's edge? No, I would have seen it. Was this a test of loyalty? Was I supposed to wait for him to resurface or go save him? I couldn't take the chance, so went to move after him. I'd just broken into stride when I felt the ground behind my feet shudder with metal scraping through soil and against stone, then a whistle caught up with the 'clump' the Gibben had made at my heels.
I turned in a flash and, a full half a mile away from me in the opposite direction, there stood Billy. Just how had he managed that, travelling a full mile passing me halfway in a split second without me seeing him? And still find time to fling an axe with such precision that its impact had spewed soil and grit up between my ankles?
Yes, I may be stronger than Billy now. But he had a bag of tricks up his sleeve against which I was no match. I took my eye off him for a second to bend down to heft out the axe from the ground, but his hand was on it before mine. I literally staggered backwards in surprise.
That half-smile had spread to his lips once again and, pointing the tip of the axe right into the corner of his eye, he explained it succinctly: Slippage! Our kind inhabited that world between worlds, right on the edge of peripheral vision. Whilst someone could perceivably see a whole panorama from the corner of their eye, the distance the eye physically travelled to take it all in was a matter of mere millimetres. Those millimetres were our vehicle!
For the next two hours—out there on a clifftop path in the obsidian night—Billy taught me how to use Slippage. Being so close to the crashing waves beneath ensured that I concentrated fully on the task at hand.
By the time the moon had come to rest upon the hulls of the moored boats and the horizon opposite was turning fog-grey, I'd just about grasped the concept. I don't know whether Billy feigned the couple of times he looked genuinely surprised to find me a way off from where he'd last seen me. But I'd felt the journey: it was surreal. Travelling on the tide of Slippage felt as if you didn't really exist at all. In truth, while you were travelling, I got the sense that I was no longer in this realm, the hard fact of an Earth beneath your feet a seeming improbability.
Even more unnerving was the sense of other creatures inhabiting that temporary space you inhabited along the way. Whatever creatures lived there, I wasn't ready to meet them. Yet. Stay in that realm for any longer than you needed to make the journey and I had the feeling that all the supernatural powers I possessed on this Earth would count for very little there. Not a place in which a fledgling vampire wished to dwell if he was to realise the potential of eternal life.
For tonight, training was over. If this was the sum of my education, I felt I'd learned a good deal, but nothing like enough. But now the dawn beckoned and the night for us was over. Time for sleep. But I had no idea how or where my bed (or coffin?) lay. I let Billy lead and was almost asleep when I fell to sleep on a vacated shelf in the Manor's mausoleum.
"No coffin?", I asked Billy. He pointed to his wrist, then made a circle twice where a watch would have sat upon someone who needed to tell the time.
"Tomorrow night?" I asked, to confirm my interpretation. I saw him nod before the lid to his coffin slid closed and I myself drifted into a dreamless sleep.
6.b, Heed the Warnings: They Exist to Serve Us
Billy had delivered me unto this life, as I had prayed, as I had eventually bade him. His master had, in turn, inaugurated, ingratiated and instructed him in whatever art in which he was now so very proficient. The time was drawing near to meet that master.
Whoever the master was, he had the foresight to shield himself from anyone who had access to Billy's mind. It could be that Billy did a grand job of shielding the Master's identity himself, but I'd been in there. It wasn't only the chaotic catalogue of Billy's mind that made me doubt his ability to hide anything. It was also that, when he was in that state, 'tied' in the blood, his emotions overwhelmed him. I had serious doubts about his ability to be aware of anything else.
I could only assume that the Master was some fearful wretch who, throughout history, had preceded to amass a colony of vampires. He had been careful so far not to rouse suspicions of mortal man beyond that of legend, but had been active enough to ensure the longevity of the breed.
This feared breed, depicted in legend immemorial across creeds, across time. Shape shifters, bloodsuckers, the night stalker, the creature that scoffs at the grave, yet seeks solace in its very earth, day after day after torturous day. Garlic-haters, crucifixationalists, virgin-seeking soul-takers. Disheartened Catholics, selling their soul in frustration at The Church in whose teachings they were raised, but no longer believed.
Joining the Brotherhood of the Night was their way of taunting its priests just by their very existence, thus disproving theories upon which The Vatican City itself had built its very foundations, itself spanning the centuries and crushing heretics who'd dared stand in its way.
Ancient lore has many interpretations of and names for our kind: vampire, wampir, vampyr; legend had even deigned to hang a garland around Vlad's once-spliced neck and christened him Drakool or Dracul, the dragon, then Dracula, son of the dragon. Is that not the name given to Satan in Revelations 12?
Even with so much evidence—or conjecture, depending upon your belief—people prefer to remain blind to our existence. Denial suits the Master's cause, it seems. But one thing mankind cannot refute is that they have not been warned.
What if, just beyond that shadow, what you think you saw is real? Your brainwashing that vampires cannot exist is more palatable than the fear that would come with accepting us for what we are. You cannot accept us without descending into a mire of madness, as your instinct screams at you that what you don't believe will remain confined to myth.
You see, we are not hiding, merely invisible. That world between worlds we inhabit is made all the more tangible by your ignorance. For those who know where to look (and have the stomach for it), a whole new existence without end beckons.
Whoever the master was, he had the foresight to shield himself from anyone who had access to Billy's mind. It could be that Billy did a grand job of shielding the Master's identity himself, but I'd been in there. It wasn't only the chaotic catalogue of Billy's mind that made me doubt his ability to hide anything. It was also that, when he was in that state, 'tied' in the blood, his emotions overwhelmed him. I had serious doubts about his ability to be aware of anything else.
I could only assume that the Master was some fearful wretch who, throughout history, had preceded to amass a colony of vampires. He had been careful so far not to rouse suspicions of mortal man beyond that of legend, but had been active enough to ensure the longevity of the breed.
This feared breed, depicted in legend immemorial across creeds, across time. Shape shifters, bloodsuckers, the night stalker, the creature that scoffs at the grave, yet seeks solace in its very earth, day after day after torturous day. Garlic-haters, crucifixationalists, virgin-seeking soul-takers. Disheartened Catholics, selling their soul in frustration at The Church in whose teachings they were raised, but no longer believed.
Joining the Brotherhood of the Night was their way of taunting its priests just by their very existence, thus disproving theories upon which The Vatican City itself had built its very foundations, itself spanning the centuries and crushing heretics who'd dared stand in its way.
Ancient lore has many interpretations of and names for our kind: vampire, wampir, vampyr; legend had even deigned to hang a garland around Vlad's once-spliced neck and christened him Drakool or Dracul, the dragon, then Dracula, son of the dragon. Is that not the name given to Satan in Revelations 12?
"And war broke out in heaven: Michael and his angels fought with the dragon; and the dragon and his angels fought, but they did not prevail, nor was a place found for them in heaven any longer. So the great dragon was cast out, that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world; he was cast to the earth, and his angels were cast out with him."
Even with so much evidence—or conjecture, depending upon your belief—people prefer to remain blind to our existence. Denial suits the Master's cause, it seems. But one thing mankind cannot refute is that they have not been warned.
What if, just beyond that shadow, what you think you saw is real? Your brainwashing that vampires cannot exist is more palatable than the fear that would come with accepting us for what we are. You cannot accept us without descending into a mire of madness, as your instinct screams at you that what you don't believe will remain confined to myth.
You see, we are not hiding, merely invisible. That world between worlds we inhabit is made all the more tangible by your ignorance. For those who know where to look (and have the stomach for it), a whole new existence without end beckons.
« « Chapter 5
Edited and republished 3rd May, 2020
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